A moment with God

I had an amazing moment with God today. And I could've missed it very easily. I had spoken with my cousin earlier this week about meeting up with her family at church this morning, especially since I knew Jarrod was going to be working today. So this morning my alarm went off and I ;did not want to get out of bed. I texted my cousin to see if they were still planning on going and she told me she'd had a late night and was planning on going to the later service (which I couldn't make because I have plans this afternoon) but would get up and go to the earlier service if I wanted. I told her not to worry about it and to get some sleep, then I rolled over and reset my alarm for about an hour later.

I laid in bed for maybe 10 minutes and kept debating whether or not I should get up and go to church anyways. I don't believe I've ever gone to a Sunday service by myself, so it sounded a little daunting. Like eating at a restaurant alone. But I kept debating it in my head and I realized that I was already awake by this point so I went ahead and got up to go to Celebration Family Church.

Since I'd laid in bed for so long, I ended up being about 15 minute late (eesh) and of course they take me up to the second row to sit! But it was OK, because I was seated behind some good friends of mine that I don't get to see too often. Worship is obviously in full swing by this point, so I took off my coat and almost as soon as I began to focus on the service, I started to cry. Don't know what hit me, but it was there. I know I've been in a desperate place lately and I guess I was reaching up out of there. Then they began singing this amazing song with the lyrics, "Suddenly I can feel you healing me. Sweep me away." It's a beautiful song by Charlie Hall and it hit me right where I was. To the point that I couldn't even get any words out.

The pastor called for the prayer team to come up front to be there for anyone who needed anything: healing, wisdom, strength, anything. For some reason I had in my head, "I don't want to go up there. I don't know these people. I'll just stay right here." But then my friend I mentioned before walked up and stood with them and I knew that God was calling me to stand together with someone in faith this morning, with someone who has some understanding of what I've gone through in my life. We shared a great moment of prayer and it felt good having someone else there, holding my hand and leading me to a spiritual place.

I know that this is the start of something, but I also know that I have to make it into SOMETHING. It's hard from where I've come from and I've closed myself off to a lot in the past. It's not going to be easy. I found this beautiful Psalm just now that really spoke to me.

Psalm 34 – The Message

I bless God every chance I get; my lungs expand with his praise.

I live and breathe God; if things aren't going well, hear this and be happy:

Join me in spreading the news; together let's get the word out.

God met me more than halfway, he freed me from my anxious fears.

Look at him; give him your warmest smile.

Never hide your feelings from him.

When I was desperate, I called out, and God got me out of a tight spot.

God's angel sets up a circle of protection around us while we pray.

Open your mouth and taste, open your eyes and see - how good God is.

Blessed are you who run to him.

Worship God if you want the best; worship opens doors to all his goodness.

Young lions on the prowl get hungry, but God-seekers are full of God.

Come, children, listen closely; I'll give you a lesson in God worship.

Who out there has a lust for life?

Can't wait each day to come upon beauty?

Guard your tongue from profanity, and no more lying through your teeth.

Turn your back on sin; do something good.

Embrace peace—don't let it get away!

God keeps an eye on his friends, his ears pick up every moan and groan.

God won't put up with rebels; he'll cull them from the pack.

Is anyone crying for help? God is listening, ready to rescue you.

If your heart is broken, you'll find God right there;

if you're kicked in the gut, he'll help you catch your breath.

Disciples so often get into trouble; still, God is there every time.

He's your bodyguard, shielding every bone; not even a finger gets broken.

The wicked commit slow suicide; they waste their lives hating the good.

God pays for each slave's freedom;