Today is my final day of eating a "normal" diet. I start the Specific Carbohydrate Diet in the morning. I spent a good bit of the day cooking with my parents, getting prepared for this next step. I've got soup on the stove, "jello" in the fridge and some eggs and beef ready to be eaten.
I'm definitely a little nervous. This is a big change, but I'm working hard to be prepared. The foods listed above are what will constitute my diet for the next several days. Depending on how that goes, I'll soon start adding in some new veggies and meats and eventually fruits and nuts.
I'll update how the first days go and post some good recipes I come across. This is the end of this part of my life, but beginning of something bigger. I'm really looking forward to feeling better.
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Not what I wanted to hear
This is one of those blog posts where I don't know where to start. I want to be completely honest on here, but sometimes there are things I just don't want to tell everyone... like when I don't get good results from a colonoscopy.
So my week off hasn't been too much of a week off. I spent Tuesday preparing for my colonoscopy (which anyone who's had one knows, is much worse than the actual procedure.) I had the procedure yesterday morning. I had the good idea this time to have Jarrod record the post-op conversation with my doctor, since you never remember these things when you're under anesthesia. So this time I actually got to listen to the conversation after I got back home.
Basically he told me that things look worse since my last colonoscopy, which I had in October of last year, right before I started the new meds. So being on the new meds for four months has not helped and I am officially off of them now... which technically means I am on no medication for Crohn's for the first time in about 13 years.
He basically told me that for someone as high functioning as I am, I have the worst looking gut he's ever seen. He's always telling me how stoic I am and that my bar for "normal" is so out of whack that I don't even know what "normal" is any more. He wants me to consider surgical options. I don't consider surgery an option... at all.
I think all of this finally hit me today. I spent a good part of the day being pretty depressed. (I also blame the lousy weather a little.) Dealing with being out of work and bad results from this is a lot to handle all at once. But I'm done with that. Sometimes I think you just need a down day to get all of that out of your system in order to get past it and move on.
I had seriously been considering starting up the Specific Carbohydrate Diet again (info here) but had been waiting for the results from this colonoscopy. So now I've decided to start that on Monday. Jarrod is going to be out of town for work, so I figure it's a good time to get going on that. I tried the diet out a few years ago, but it didn't stick. However, looking back now, I realize that I was totally unprepared to start the diet at that time. I feel that I'm in a much better position to do it successfully this time.
It's going to be a big change. It's essentially eliminating all wheat/grains, dairy, soy and sugar. And what does that leave? Doesn't seem like a lot. But essentially, it's getting back to nature and making things from scratch. And getting a little creative with your cooking. It's going to be a lot of work, but if it helps, then it's definitely worth it.
I've been doing some soul-searching, too, on what God has planned from here. I know this isn't what he wants for me, but it's definitely hard to keep the faith when you feel like this all of the time. I appreciate everyone's prayers, cause God knows, I need 'em (pun intended). I know at this point, if anything works, it's going to be his doing.
So my week off hasn't been too much of a week off. I spent Tuesday preparing for my colonoscopy (which anyone who's had one knows, is much worse than the actual procedure.) I had the procedure yesterday morning. I had the good idea this time to have Jarrod record the post-op conversation with my doctor, since you never remember these things when you're under anesthesia. So this time I actually got to listen to the conversation after I got back home.
Basically he told me that things look worse since my last colonoscopy, which I had in October of last year, right before I started the new meds. So being on the new meds for four months has not helped and I am officially off of them now... which technically means I am on no medication for Crohn's for the first time in about 13 years.
He basically told me that for someone as high functioning as I am, I have the worst looking gut he's ever seen. He's always telling me how stoic I am and that my bar for "normal" is so out of whack that I don't even know what "normal" is any more. He wants me to consider surgical options. I don't consider surgery an option... at all.
I think all of this finally hit me today. I spent a good part of the day being pretty depressed. (I also blame the lousy weather a little.) Dealing with being out of work and bad results from this is a lot to handle all at once. But I'm done with that. Sometimes I think you just need a down day to get all of that out of your system in order to get past it and move on.
I had seriously been considering starting up the Specific Carbohydrate Diet again (info here) but had been waiting for the results from this colonoscopy. So now I've decided to start that on Monday. Jarrod is going to be out of town for work, so I figure it's a good time to get going on that. I tried the diet out a few years ago, but it didn't stick. However, looking back now, I realize that I was totally unprepared to start the diet at that time. I feel that I'm in a much better position to do it successfully this time.
It's going to be a big change. It's essentially eliminating all wheat/grains, dairy, soy and sugar. And what does that leave? Doesn't seem like a lot. But essentially, it's getting back to nature and making things from scratch. And getting a little creative with your cooking. It's going to be a lot of work, but if it helps, then it's definitely worth it.
I've been doing some soul-searching, too, on what God has planned from here. I know this isn't what he wants for me, but it's definitely hard to keep the faith when you feel like this all of the time. I appreciate everyone's prayers, cause God knows, I need 'em (pun intended). I know at this point, if anything works, it's going to be his doing.
Friday, February 10, 2012
My work here is done.
I've been hinting around for a few weeks now on some big changes coming for me, and today, I finally feel like I'm at the point where I can talk about it.
Today is my last day at NBC-17. I've been there for 2 1/2 years and just realized that it's time for me to move on. The hours and stress of the job have been difficult for me and I'm looking forward to doing something a little more low-key. But I will definitely miss the wonderful people there. I'll look forward to catching them on the air in the future. I'll also miss getting off of work at 12:30... and going into "breaking news" mode... and hurricane coverage. But I won't miss getting up at 3 a.m. Or snow coverage.
So what will I be doing now, you ask? Well, that's still a little up in the air. I haven't found anything yet that I really want to do, so I figure I'll do something that'll get us by for the time being until I can find something better. The difficult part about this is that I'm not really sure what I want to do. But I guess I'll have a chance to figure that out.
Jarrod and I are taking a big leap of faith here, but we really do feel that it's the right thing to do. I know the weeks and months ahead may be difficult, but we're believing that we'll get through just fine. I'm looking forward to having some more time since I won't be having to go to bed at 8:00 and having some more energy.
But I'm excited about the future. I feel like I'm finally taking some steps in the right direction. I'm just hoping and praying that I'll be open to whatever's next for me. Here's to taking chances!
Today is my last day at NBC-17. I've been there for 2 1/2 years and just realized that it's time for me to move on. The hours and stress of the job have been difficult for me and I'm looking forward to doing something a little more low-key. But I will definitely miss the wonderful people there. I'll look forward to catching them on the air in the future. I'll also miss getting off of work at 12:30... and going into "breaking news" mode... and hurricane coverage. But I won't miss getting up at 3 a.m. Or snow coverage.
So what will I be doing now, you ask? Well, that's still a little up in the air. I haven't found anything yet that I really want to do, so I figure I'll do something that'll get us by for the time being until I can find something better. The difficult part about this is that I'm not really sure what I want to do. But I guess I'll have a chance to figure that out.
Jarrod and I are taking a big leap of faith here, but we really do feel that it's the right thing to do. I know the weeks and months ahead may be difficult, but we're believing that we'll get through just fine. I'm looking forward to having some more time since I won't be having to go to bed at 8:00 and having some more energy.
But I'm excited about the future. I feel like I'm finally taking some steps in the right direction. I'm just hoping and praying that I'll be open to whatever's next for me. Here's to taking chances!
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
For my big sis
I wanted to write a special post for my sister's birthday, but I was out of town with no computer access for the actual day. So I'm a few days behind, but as the cliche goes... "better late, than never."
Anyone who has a big sister knows what an inspiration they are in your life, and that's definitely what Beka has been to me. I've found myself at various points in my life where I'll look to her and her life for wisdom on what to do. And I'm always asking for her advice.
Beka's the type of person who really would do anything for you. You need somebody at 3:00 in the morning and she'd be there. If you need somebody just to vent to on the phone, she's there to listen.
She is such a strong woman and has been through some things that I can't even imagine, but she always handles them with such grace. She's one of those people who truly can make the best of something where others may fall apart. When the economy went downhill and her company closed, she started her own design firm and now has created a successful business in the midst of a recession. I mean, who does that??
Not gonna lie, I'm a little envious of her life. She's constantly surrounded by such beauty, not only from within but also in the things she does. I wish I was as good as she is at taking something mundane and turning it in to something beautiful.
So, Beka, I love you. Thanks for being the best big sister ever! And I hope you had a wonderful birthday!
Anyone who has a big sister knows what an inspiration they are in your life, and that's definitely what Beka has been to me. I've found myself at various points in my life where I'll look to her and her life for wisdom on what to do. And I'm always asking for her advice.
Beka's the type of person who really would do anything for you. You need somebody at 3:00 in the morning and she'd be there. If you need somebody just to vent to on the phone, she's there to listen.
She is such a strong woman and has been through some things that I can't even imagine, but she always handles them with such grace. She's one of those people who truly can make the best of something where others may fall apart. When the economy went downhill and her company closed, she started her own design firm and now has created a successful business in the midst of a recession. I mean, who does that??
Not gonna lie, I'm a little envious of her life. She's constantly surrounded by such beauty, not only from within but also in the things she does. I wish I was as good as she is at taking something mundane and turning it in to something beautiful.
So, Beka, I love you. Thanks for being the best big sister ever! And I hope you had a wonderful birthday!
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
Defying Gravity
I can't believe another month has already come and gone. And before we know it it'll be another month and another year. And at the end of that, I hope we'll all be proud of what we've done and have become. I'm very reflective at the moment because I know this month is going to bring some changes. I'm right on the edge, preparing to jump into whatever the rest of my life will hold and I'm excited... and a little anxious... and a little scared.
I know I'm where I'm supposed to be, but that doesn't mean that a little unsurity doesn't creep in every now and then. Big things are coming. I've got a colonoscopy coming up soon which will help determine the future of my treatment. I have the writing class in a few weeks, which makes me kind of nervous. But I'm glad for the excitement. I feel like I've been playing it safe for a while and now I'm taking charge.
I'm not posting any goals this month. Trust me, I have some and I'll post updates on anything I get accomplished. But for now, it's time to take that leap... and see where I land.
I know I'm where I'm supposed to be, but that doesn't mean that a little unsurity doesn't creep in every now and then. Big things are coming. I've got a colonoscopy coming up soon which will help determine the future of my treatment. I have the writing class in a few weeks, which makes me kind of nervous. But I'm glad for the excitement. I feel like I've been playing it safe for a while and now I'm taking charge.
I'm not posting any goals this month. Trust me, I have some and I'll post updates on anything I get accomplished. But for now, it's time to take that leap... and see where I land.
Something has changed within me, Something is not the same
I'm through with playing by the rules of someone else's game
Too late for second-guessing, Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts, Close my eyes and leap.
It's time to try Defying gravity
I think I'll try Defying gravity
And you can't pull me down!
-Wicked
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